Jealousy

Years ago the Lord taught me a lesson about being jealous of something that someone else has. I was in the 4Th grade and knew better!! The Lord taught me that by being jealous of others we not only betray our self but also hurt the other person. Most of all I feel like we harm ourselves if we let something like that fester.

I got an allowance every week by doing chores. We lived on a farm. I got .25 cents a week. I always saved my money. I would only spend a little at a time. My Grandpa Henry said I was the only smart one. haha!

My best and only friend was the little girl, Louise, who lived across the pasture from us. She was 3 years younger than I. She was in the first grade and was sooo excited about school and all of her school supplies. She had a little 6 inch ruler that was turquoise. I loved that color when I was little. It was not so much the color or the idea that I could not buy a ruler like hers... it was being jealous over how happy she was. I could have bought 10 rulers like that for 5 or 10 cents!!

While she was outside playing I went into the one room school house and took her ruler!! I hid the ruler inside my desk. When class started she realized that her ruler was gone! She was almost in tears and told me that someone had taken her ruler!! I of course thought that was terrible. When we had another recess I ran back into the school and put the ruler back in her desk as fast as I could. I can still remember how relieved I felt. When we returned from recess she told me that someone had put her ruler back into her desk. I felt so ashamed for what I had done.

I remember later when I was 12 being in the dime store and seeing a girl get caught stealing something. She was crying. The store manager said they were going to call her parents. That also taught me a lesson later in life.

Sometimes we feel like things that we do is not stealing. I should have known better on this one too!! I lived in San Antonio, Texas and there was a store that had a grand opening. My friend and I went. It was sooo crowded! They were selling shorts and blouse sets. I found the shorts that I liked, but did not like the blouse that went with it. I found another blouse that I liked better. :) They were the same price and I didn't feel like it was stealing. Hmmm So I changed blouses!! The first time that I washed that blouse... it fell all to pieces!! My thought.. well that is what I get for being dishonest. Thank You Lord.

Singing gospel

Kind of nice to come here and just let my thoughts out. Like a private journal. I just got through recording 3 songs to be played at my aunt's funeral. I learned early on that by doing gospel music.. you must be prepared for anything!

I did a gospel recording in 1986 which opened up doors for me. I never will forget the first time I went to a local church to sing. I was getting around pretty good. This was something new for me. I had all my things organized and just had to get dressed. When I got ready to put on my clothes... I could not find my half slip!! Where did it go!! I swore that I had it laying on the bed. After too much time spent looking for it... I thought I would look UNDER the bed !!! Sure enough... there it was. How did it actually get under the bed? How could it slip off of the bed and then go under it?? Running a little late but still alright. Before I went out the door I thought I would spray some mouth spray in my mouth. It was a small bottle of mouth spray that you carry in your handbag. I sprayed it in my mouth... so I thought!! I sprayed it in my eye!! I had worn contacts that day. Here I am with my eye watering... mascara going down my face... red eye!! What else could possibly go wrong. I got there on time, but needless to say I was a nervous wreck. Everything went smooth after I got there. Thank You Lord.

Just writing tonight and don't know what I will write??

We went to assistant living today. Gary taught, Jim said prayer, Christel read some scriptures, and I sang 2 songs.... "Shepherd Of My Valley" and "Just A Closer Walk With Thee". The song Shepherd of my valley reminds me so much of my dad. My uncle gave me a cassette with that song on it. My dad was so peaceful through his death. He said that if Jesus had to suffer; then why shouldn't we have to suffer? The day he passed away, he raised up on his elbow and said... "Well, Jesus that is You." He was then gone.

I received word from my aunt that her sister, and my aunt (one week younger than I) is with hospice. Her body is shutting down. She is Down Syndrome. We call that disabled... but yet are they? She enjoys the simple things in life. Happy with little. She has lived in an assistant living for almost 30 years. When she was younger she went to work everyday making fishing flies. She enjoyed her work and loved spending what little money that she made. She received a paycheck and learned to sign her own name. Sharon is very loved by others; her family, friends, staff, and nurses. The home is planning on making the trip to her funeral. It is a sad time for everyone. Even though she is Down Syndrome she has heard about Jesus. She was in the hospital last week when my aunt went to see her. They talked and Sharon told her sister that she would get to see Momma and Daddy again. She was near death and they thought they were going to loose her then.

If God knew when we were born... which I believe He has control of... then He also knows the day that we will die. Being able to let God have control is peace beyond understanding. Things that are hard to bear are possible through God. I feel like at times ... just knowing that ... If God is for us, who can be against us... is enough. Weighing out our lives... the good and the bad... if we do not receive more good.. it is still enough. Jesus gave us His all. He tells us to weep when we are born and to rejoice when we die. We seem to have things backwards.

Thank You Father for the things that I take for granted in life. Most of all thank You for Your Son... Jesus Christ. Amen