I almost died twice before the age of 4 years old

When I was about 6 months old my mother poisoned me with her milk. She got a job and wasn't going to breast feed me anymore. One night she let me nurse. I was burning up with fever. The doctor said if they gave me one drop of milk it would kill me. My mother and father was living with my Granny. Mom said she begged Granny to get me well. My Granny feed me nothing but the water off of soaked toast. I know that was not the plan of God, for me to die. I am sure that my Granny did a lot of praying.

Right before I turned 4 I got scarlet fever. Mom and daddy had been living in California at the time. We lived in a trailer court. Uncle Dink and Aunt Wanetta came also. Everyone was working. Granny came to California and took me back to Kansas with her. I would go any where with my Granny. Soon after she got me back to Kansas I got scarlet fever. I can barely remember. I remember when mom came back to Kansas that I fell in the floor when running to meet her. Granny said I could not walk and almost had to learn to walk all over again. My 7th grade principle told me that he lost his daughter (same age as me) with scarlet fever. I am sure that I would have died if Granny had not taken me home with her.

Really up too late!!

We moved back to the town where my Granny lived when I was in the 9th grade. I graduated from that school. They had a contest that summer before I went into the 9th grade. My Granny's sister's daughter... Jane Ellen played the piano. So Aunt Mavis and Jane Ellen decided that Lynette (7 years old) and I would enter the contest. haha! Lynette sang a Elvis song and I sang the old Johnny Ray song... "Just Walkin In The Rain". I remember my cousin saying that her fingers might not work... and I might be walkin' in the rain!! lol My dad was pretty easy going but he was very upset that I was going to enter the contest. He said that I was going to make a fool of myself. Years later I realized that my dad was more than likely thinking about me singing in night clubs and etc. Being in the wild life?? I took 3rd place, the school band boys took first, and the banker's daughter took 2nd doing a dance. Her music stopped while she was dancing but she finished her dance without the music. lol

I hated music class in school. I could never sing with the other girls because I was a low singer. Maybe if I had gone to music I would have learned to harmonize or something?? When singing with a group I have to sing with the men... tenor.. I guess?? I use to sing in the gym after gym class for the girls. I would take my song books and they would want me to sing. We would have about a 10 or 15 minute break after gym. The gym teacher use to let me sing?? My mom found out that I was singing because she worked at the local drugstore with some older girls. The girls that worked at the drug store told my mom that the science teacher use to let them sit there and listen to me sing. I did not know that until later years. lol My mom's boss was so funny. He was a pharmacist and he would have me come to the back of the drugstore and sing a song over his microphone. I was always so nervous doing that. lol

I never sang anywhere for years but continued to sing with my records. I loved to sing.

God's plan

We moved about 6 miles from my Granny and I went to a different school. I went there 2 years. I was in the 7th and 8th grade. I loved to sing so when our music teacher told us that we could sing at our play in the 7th grade... well I said I would sing. I can still remember going to the mic and singing "Satisfied Mind". lol I have a very strong voice. I sang a couple of lines with the mic and then stepped away from it and sang the rest. lol The kids laughed and I laughed too. Everything went real well and the kids applauded for me.

The next year, 8th grade... my music teacher got a hold of me and said she wanted me to sing!! She played the piano for me. She wanted me to sing "Tumbling Tumble Weeds" !! I told her that the music was too high for me. She said that she would lower it for me. I did fine through practice. Well the day that I sang on stage I think she raised the song!! I was nervous because the lights were on in the auditorium. I don't think the lights were on the year before. I could see all them kids out there watching me!! The first words of Tumbling Tumble Weeds is... "I'm a roaming cowboy"!! Of course all the kids laughed!! I thought they were laughing at me. To make things worse... my voice went into a high pitch sound! I ran off of the stage crying. My best friend went with me. I was in the bathroom crying so hard when my 8th grade English teacher came in to see about me. Mrs. White. She wore glasses and I remember her even crying with me. She hugged me and told me that she was going to get permission for me to sing in her play. Oh No!!! No way was I ever going to sing again!! Never!! She said.. Yes you are. I will put a spot light on you and you will not be able to see the people in the audience.

She got permission for me to leave my class for play practice. Our play was "Oklahoma". The song that I sang was "Red River Valley". She had about 4 boys sitting around a fake campfire day dreaming about their sweetheart back home. She had a spot light on me... and I kind of walked behind them. The play took first in Junior High and we did the play for parents and everyone. Thinking back now I could just kick myself for not trying to find this teacher!! What she did for me was unbelievable.

On old computer!!

Well there isn't any way that I can be making comments on any journals right now. :( I am on my old computer. Need to take my new one in and get it fixed even if I have to pay to get it done! I am not that smart when it comes to computers. This old computer is soooo slow!!!

Back when I was growing up my family didn't go to church. Once in a while I would go to church with the neighbors across the field. I remember this little girl that I went to school with in the second grade spent the night with me. She had a little gold pin that was attached to her slip with a safety pin. She was Catholic. I really liked the little pin. She explained to me that it was to protect her. lol She gave me her pin because she said she had another one. :) I wore that little pin on my slip for a long time.

My Granny was always singing... most of the songs she sang was gospel. I think just about everyone that was related to my Granny loved to sing. When I got older my Granny would want me to sing with her. She wanted me to sing lead and then she would harmanize with me. haha! I can still hear her saying... Janie Marie you are singing with me!! When I was 12 we moved to Oklahoma where she lived. One time she got me up in church to sing with her. Oh my!! Again she said... Janie Marie you are singing with me. What a treat it would be to sing with her now. I think I could sing lead now. lol

For years I would sit and sing with my records. I would sit for hours singing. I was an only child and didn't have that many friends. My dad would sing with me when we drove to my Grandma's. I had all them books that had the words to the songs in them. My mother would just sit the whole time we were singing.

Thoughs of yesterday

Mother's Day is this coming Sunday. I was in the kitchen doing something... ?? The thoughts of my Granny came to mind. She was always like a second mother to me while growing up. I married a military man when I was 19 years old. I was an only child. I was gone away from family for 9 years. When my husband was sent to Okinawa I returned home to stay for 18 months. My Granny lived behind me on the other block. Soon her and my step-grandfather moved to a near by town 7 miles away. It wasn't long until my Granny started getting sick. She had pain in her left side. In my mind I always thought that when she had a fall on her back porch and hurt her left side... that is what caused it. She changed doctors. He talked her into having surgery. After the surgery the doctor gave her 6 weeks to 6 months to live. She had cancer of the pancreas and colon. She was a very strong lady so therefore it took her longer to die. :( She passed away the day before my birthday.

Friday as I was standing in the kitchen thoughts of my Granny came to mind. She was 68 years old when she passed away. That is only about 3 years older than I am now. So young! I remember thinking how old my Granny looked. She had the silver blue hair and was over weight. Needed to loose about 50 pounds at the most. She was a loving person and would feed anyone. When my step-grandfather lost his job she took in little old ladies to take care of. One little lady would have died if my Granny would not have taken care of her. She took such good care of them. She would wash their hair, fix it, and even give them a permanent. Thinking of her... I am thinking... did she feel as young as I feel?? I am sure that she did. She just acted different than I do. lol

It was very hard on my mother loosing her mother. Three months later her brother got killed in a car accident. Oh... how it hurt my mother!

Day before Mother's Day

Today I was getting ready for Mother's Day tomorrow. I vacuumed the whole house. I wanted to do some dusting in case some of the kids came to the house. Not that they would mind... just wanted it to look half way good.

My step-dad called and said that he had cooked some beans with ham and wanted to know if we wanted to eat with him. Hmmm I did not want to go. :( Gary did not really want to go either... but we went. It seemed to just ruin and interfere with my plans.

The next day it was Mother's Day. I lost mom December 2005. I set the table to eat beans and cornbread. I took 3 pieces of chocolate cake. Gary did not want any so I left them with my step-dad.

I did the dishes and while standing at the sink I looked out the kitchen window that my mother had looked out. Looking at the plants coming up that she loved. As I washed dishes I was thinking of her standing at the sink. There was just a sadness in my heart. I was not wanting that feeling at this time and place. Not realizing that the place where the silverware goes in the dish washer... it was broken. The silver ware was falling through and I could not get the dish washer door to close! The more I tried to close the door.. the worse it got!!! I bruised up my hands and arms trying to fix it. I was so upset and my blood pressure was rising!! I was ready to tear the door off of the dish washer! This was just not my plans for the day! Beans usually upset my stomach. Why didn't I just say... No tomorrow is Mother's Day!

Mother's Day 2009

Went to church this morning. We had a missionary and his wife from India through Sunday School. The message was a great message. Told us that America had changed in the last 3 years and we need to stay strong as Christians. Soon we may be without our freedom of religion.

My son and his wife gave me a necklace, ear rings, and bracelet. My daughter-in-law made them. They also gave me an orchid and card. My other daughter-in-law sent me a card. My daughter wanted to come out today but poor little Carlie is running 102 temp. We went ahead and stopped at the local cafe and ate breakfast before coming home. Later my step-dad came out to our house. I made some strawberries with sugar; and served with angel food cake. He left at 5:30. We had a lazy day watching old westerns. I had a wonderful Mother's Day.